Simplicity

Today her means of survival was to be simple,
to be a human being uncomplicated and
easy-going of mind.

It had been a sheer practical decision,
no inner impulses, no intense emotional drive.
She was going to structure the chaos -
And organize her life as if counting to ten.

The strategy was easy: her work load had to be
doubled and her meals would never anymore
be taken-out.  She was going to dig the earth and
dirty her nails, peel the potatoes and rub
the floor. She was going to throw herself
in the world of hard labeur and
thoughtless existence.

That evening around 11.30 pm she finished doing
the dishes from her 3-course meal. For some
vague reason she had invited the big family
living opposite her in the street. They had
brought their 4 kids of which she was now
seeing the result in her living room.

She knelt down and started rubbing
the carpet to remove the orange juice stains
and specks of bolognaise sauce. When she
lifted her head, her eye fell on the extensive
to-do list she had pinned on her fridge,
with the deadline coming up very soon.

She and her sister had always held firm
belief in extensive enumerations of
useful chores to do.

An extreme fatigue fell upon her,
her limbs felt stretched and ravaged,
but she knew: now was the time,
the time to keep up and
continue being focused on the tiny little
light that she had detected inside her brain-
like a hard rock, unmovable and brave.

Slowly she got up and conscientiously she
started implementing the first item from the fridge.

In the early morning -somewhere between the
dark hours of the night and dawn- she woke up on
the barren kitchen floor, fallen asleep with seven
more jobs waiting for her.

She lay still a little while, looking at her shiny
cupboards and her clean house.

She was happy.
She had slept as on a bed of roses,
and hadn't wasted a second on any
useless   e n d l e s s
thought.